Volodia

Everybody is looking for something in life, going after something. I’m not an exception to that; I was also looking in different directions, trying things that this world had to offer. We, people, want to succeed in life, but everyone has his own ideas of how to do it. After finishing secondary school I went to Technical School in order to get a paper confirming that I have a sufficient education, planning to find a job and start living the happy life of an independent adult.

What is gonna help me to get established in this cruel world where power and money rule? In addition to studies I was into boxing. In knowing how to apply my fists I saw a way of achieving my goals. My “happy” life went on full speed. Fight, fight, the strongest is always right. Crime, robbery and so on… You are going after your dream and are ready to pay the price not understanding to the end that the price in reality is your life.

At this point my cousin started telling me about Jesus, about the living God who died for the sins of the world and rose again, and that I can be reconciled to God and live with God… It didn’t make any sense to me, so I advised him to shut up. I felt sorry for my poor cousin -“sect-member”- and I soon forgot about what he was telling me, continuing my life in the same direction. Money and cars can never satisfy. They are never enough. Money can never be too much. You always want to replace the car with a better one. Knowing that there was more, I wanted more.

This same "search" brought me to drugs. The bad things I heard about drugs did not stop me. I’m strong, it broke the lives of the others, it won’t break mine I thought. But the problem is that no drug addict was actually planning on becoming a drug addict and the first “harmless” steps are but the beginning of a terrible inevitable end. Continuing the search, I drowned myself in various books on the occult. I started spending time with an ESP person; in addition to that I started using LSD, discovering more and more that in addition to the material world there exists something else. I realized that there are a lot of hidden powers that most people don’t have access to. I understood that even without applying physical efforts you can get from people what you want. Some spiritual principles were revealed to me. You do not understand things but know they work. It seems like the only thing you need to do is to learn how to use it. At some point I realized that God and and the devil are both real, they are not grandmother’s fairy tales, they do exist. But it seemed to me that I’m on top of the situation and everything is under my control. It was not so.

One day I got into a bad car crash that almost killed me. In the hospital I did an evaluation of the life I’d lived to that point. I realized that out of everything I got, I could take nothing to the grave with me. I was disappointed in my values but could not find a new set of values. At this point, after visiting one fellow in order to buy drugs from him I started spending time with his strange parents. They were really different from everybody around. They were the only people out of all I knew who loved me just the way I was. They kept telling me that Jesus died on the cross for my sins, and I can receive forgiveness from God and turn a new page in life. Within my short life span I managed to do very many very bad things and I really wanted to receive forgiveness. In January of 1999 I turned to Jesus Christ with my whole heart: “ If you really exist, please forgive me and save me!” God saved me and I dedicated my life to Him.

Almost 4 years have past since then. I’m free from drugs; my life of a criminal is in the past. I know that everything is forgiven. God is real! Whatever is in your past God has forgiveness for you. God has mercy for those who confess their sins and forsake them. But if we are stubbornly insisting on going our own way, we will perish. In the Bible God is calling the people: “I take no pleasure in the death of the sinner, but rather that they turn from their ways and live. Turn! Turn from your evil ways! Why will you die?” It is possible that your life looks much less corrupt than mine, but if you take an honest look into your heart, you’ll see that you have things to repent before God for. The choice is yours. And you are choosing between death and life.

Repentance is just the beginning. Jesus said, "I am the way." And only having a real, close relationship with Him will you be able to walk this way. Prayer, reading the Bible (start with the New Testament), fellowshipping with other believers are vitally important for you. Tell others about what God has done for you. There is a reason why you were born. As you fellowship with God through prayer and the Bible He will reveal himself to you more.