Lena

There are many things in our past that we don’t like to tell others about, some of them are even shameful and disgusting to bring to memory. In my life there was not less dirt than in yours, perhaps more. But something happened that makes my case different. My past is gone and has nothing to do with me as I am today. Have you ever dreamed of returning to your past and correcting your mistakes? I always had a dream like this. I dreamed of returning to the 7^th grade and not starting to smoke, returning to that time right after high school and attending an arts college rather than going to a financial college and getting a job in the bank.

I dreamed of returning to the day when I moved in with my boyfriend and choosing not do it, because 6 months later our relationship fell apart, but I could not leave. He was a gang member, and I had to pay for this by living in fear–for myself and for him–fear that sooner or later he’d either lose his life or end up in prison. I wanted to leave but I could not. The foundation of my life back then was money and it was even a scarier thing to just drop everything and take a step into the middle of nowhere. And it was a very real fear and a very real hopelessness. I simply tried not to think about it. Also I’d like to return to 3 years ago and not try heroin. That was the biggest mistake of my life. I was 21. I realized that I was on a dead-end road, but I could do nothing about it. I just tried to escape the realities because the realities were horrible. I simply tried not to think about it because there was no way out. I had only childlike naive hope that maybe one day something would just suddenly happen and my life will take a different turn.

It so happened that we started spending time with a Christian family. We visited them in their home for some time. They told us about what God has done in their lives, that Jesus Christ became a sacrifice for the sins of all mankind and that every person can make peace with God. They said that God is strong enough to change my life, also. And the key is the death of Jesus on the cross and His resurrection.

I saw that they had something that others didn’t have. I saw their sincere love for me and the people around them. I could not feel or see or touch the God they were talking about, but I saw God’s participation in their lives. I didn’t get 100% proof of God’s existence. But all my insides answered "YES" when I was asked: “Do you want to give your heart to Jesus?”

On January 12^th 1999 my boyfriend and I prayed and gave our lives to Jesus. And He took our past, our sin and our dirt, and He gave us what we didn’t deserve. He gave us His love, His life, His forgiveness. There are no drugs, cigarettes or violence in our lives today. There is freedom from sin and emptiness. He gave me a future, He gave me hope, He gave me His righteousness, He gave me the ability to love and have compassion. And now He wants to give it to you. He’s knocking at the door of your heart. His love and His mercy is enough to set you free from the curse of your sin. And you have the right to choose.

Now if you prayed from your whole heart know that God has forgiven you and has cleansed you. But this is just the beginning. Don’t stop here. God loves you. You've probably heard about a book called The Bible, or about The New Testament. There you will find the things that will change you life forever and will reveal to you your Savior Jesus Christ and God the Father. Read it. Do not give up if you don’t understand something right away. Pray to Him, open your heart before Him and He will hear you. We will also be happy to meet with you personally and help you. With love, Lena